Cvs Protein Powder review! Bro-A-Licious!

"jkm7680" (jkm7680) 04/09/2014 at 20:46 • Filed to: Brolopnik

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It turns out I was released from corporate hell earlier than 8 which made my Happy.

So, I'm reviewing some absolutely horrible Protein Powder I bought from Cvs. Plus some random Auto parts to make this fit better.

Taste 3/10 . Have you ever tried inducing Vomiting on purpose? If you haven't and would like to explore the possibilities, try to mix this in with a Banana. I tried to, and wound up finding some horrid piece of half blended Banana mixed in there. Yuck. Even with just water, it tastes like shit.

Price 1/10. It's only slightly cheaper than Cocaine

Bro Factor 6/10 . It's Cvs brand. Not Bro-Y enough, if it isn't already.

Nasty Factor 10/10. I've already made this point. It's sorta like sticking your finger down your throat after eating Indian Food.

They give you a free measuring spoon-y thing. That's nice for $30, it better me a damn nice spoon.

Conclusion- No Bueno if you have a Gag reflex. It tastes like Sewage, and that Chocolate Milk that's been in your Aunts fridge since 1991.

Victorious Secret > jkm7680 04/09/2014 at 20:52

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I drink this just because I'm hungry sometimes. It really is good. Plus when I do feel hungry, I have access to milk so its so much better.

Mixing in water never goes well. Pinch nose and chug the poor concoction.

PatBateman > jkm7680 04/09/2014 at 20:53

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I have a 30 day supply of Shakeology, "Greenberry" flavor. Ever seen a Greenberry? No? Neither have I. Ever tasted a Greenberry? No? Congratulations, because IT SUCKS MORE THAN A SLUTTY HOOVER VACUUM.

Brian Silvestro > jkm7680 04/09/2014 at 20:54

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*shudders*

jkm7680 > PatBateman 04/09/2014 at 20:57

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I would not like to feel a Slutty Hoover Vacuum. I feel as if it would touch me in funny places.

jkm7680 > Victorious Secret 04/09/2014 at 20:58

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Yeah, With Protein powder it's a Hit or Miss.

I got this Vanilla stuff last month, It wasn't half bad.

The Chocolate flavor was 5/4ths bad.

jkm7680 > Brian Silvestro 04/09/2014 at 20:58

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As you should. Haha.

PatBateman > jkm7680 04/09/2014 at 20:58

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Just close your eyes...

BlazinAce - Doctor of Internal Combustion > jkm7680 04/09/2014 at 21:00

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There are some dudes... No, scratch that, most dudes on my brother's class, one year ahead from mine, actually live on that shit, counting calories and protein intake and pumping iron to grow muscle. It's all they ever talk about, along with hairstyles, clothing and jewelry. Most annoying pieces of shit I've ever met.

jkm7680 > PatBateman 04/09/2014 at 21:01

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Good to know. Will it hurt?

jkm7680 > BlazinAce - Doctor of Internal Combustion 04/09/2014 at 21:02

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Haha, Douchebags at their finest.

I only go to the Gym occasionally, mainly to not get fat.

PatBateman > jkm7680 04/09/2014 at 21:03

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Only after it causes irreparable damage to your junk.

Or so I've heard.

jkm7680 > PatBateman 04/09/2014 at 21:04

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Arrghhhhh, How did Anthony Sullivan talk me into this?

Gahhhh, It's on high now. Blahghghghgghghgh

Brian Silvestro > jkm7680 04/09/2014 at 21:06

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XJS thing makes it all better though.

PatBateman > jkm7680 04/09/2014 at 21:12

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High? YOU TURNED IT ON HIGH?!?!

Bad news, bro: your innards will soon be outtards.

Jeff-God-of-Biscuits > jkm7680 04/09/2014 at 21:16

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Just be glad you didn't get into my throwing eggs. That, and the eggnog that I have been saving for the last 2 years.

jkm7680 > PatBateman 04/09/2014 at 21:18

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Yep, and so they are. The leaf blower might solve this.

BlazinAce - Doctor of Internal Combustion > jkm7680 04/09/2014 at 21:19

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Yup, that's them. Douchebags all the way. I swear, there's something about that whole class that's just... Must be the water or something. The dudes are all like that, the chicks sleep with the professors. Go figure.

jkm7680 > Brian Silvestro 04/09/2014 at 21:21

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Oh yeah, that thing.

It's a two sided tape that came new with the Xjs. One side plays Grandma music, and the other side plays some old English guy talking about the breakdown schedule,

jkm7680 > BlazinAce - Doctor of Internal Combustion 04/09/2014 at 21:24

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It has to be the water, don't use the Douchefountains they contain toxic amounts of Cheap Beer mixed with protein powder.

Frank Grimes > jkm7680 04/09/2014 at 21:31

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Why you need this? You no eat meats or nuts? or stuff?

I thought that most people ate too much protein as is and dont require protein powder or supplements

jkm7680 > Frank Grimes 04/09/2014 at 21:37

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Yeah, I eat plenty of meat, dairy, nuts.

I'll probably sound like a Brodouche, but after I hit the Gym, I'll usually down some of this stuff

TillTheWheelsFallOff: Brocoma > Victorious Secret 04/09/2014 at 22:10

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BlazinAce - Doctor of Internal Combustion > jkm7680 04/09/2014 at 22:36

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Vodka. The local douches don't dig beer because it's "too weak". Of course, they then go and order those 5% ABV canned flavored vodkas.

Icemanmaybeirunoutofthetalents > jkm7680 04/09/2014 at 23:07

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This stuff actually tastes quite nice. I add a bit to a berry smoothie each day.